What is black, white, and red all over? A domino dipped in kitten blood.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Gravity

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A man orders 3,687 bricks. He gets 3,688 bricks delivered to him. He throws the extra brick in the air. Ok, so a man is smoking a cigar by a woman with a small poodle. They are both in a plane. The woman asks the man if he could get rid of the cigar because the smoke is making her dog turn green. The man refuses. In anger, she throws the cigar out of the window. The man gets angry and throws the poodle out the window. What lands in the poodles mouth when it's falling? The brick.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

"Billy Mays here!" No he's not. He's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Knock knock. Who's there? Ben. Oh hi! come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's the best part about a birthday cake? Eating it.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the chick cross the road? He didn't. He was attending his father's funeral, who had been killed earlier that week by an oncoming car as he was crossing the road.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A simple math problem. If 10% of men are gay, and 20% of men are chinese what is the probability that a man chosen at random spends his free time and meal time both on his knees?

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Terrance was going to clean his room but then he got high, do you know why? because terrance is addicted to illicit street drugs and should seek medical help.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why Can't Asian women drive? a: Cause they are chink assholes who have only peripheral vision

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's the difference between a lamborghini and a sackful of dead babies? one is a car and the other is a grotesque travesty.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Why is there so much hate in the world? Because you touch yourself at night.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Why did Captain Hook die? He wiped.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Daddy daddy daddy. What. Will you buy me a porn for my birthday. What! I want porn daddy. Shut up gosh your a 8 year old girl

thumb_up thumb_down -83

Whats helped us not be mad at Osama Binladen. His death.

thumb_up thumb_down +86

What's white and very boney? A bone

thumb_up thumb_down +76

Im gonna Rape that Liberato kid you was talking about, ALL UP THE ASS i will find him.

thumb_up thumb_down +74

So there was a pirate, he got shot in the back. And when he got shot he turned to his freind (fellow pirate) and said i have been shot and there is a pretty good chance i will die.

thumb_up thumb_down +60

What do you call three black men in a car? One driver, and two passengers.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

A sick patient asks a doctor, "will i be able to play my guitar?" The doctor replies, "of course you will be able to". "Good because that is my only form of income", says the patient.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

a blond, brunette, and red head run away from cops and hide in potato sacks. the officer went up to the brunette and kicked the potato bag and the brunette went "woof" "woof". the officer went to the red head and kicked the potato bag and the red head went "meow" "meow". the officer goes to the blond and kicked the potato bag and the blond went "potato".

thumb_up thumb_down +48

roses are red violets are blue kiss my ass you god damb goe..

thumb_up thumb_down +46

What did a cat said to another cat? Nothing because cata dont talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

why couldnt the gay man marry??? cause he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops