Roses are red Violets are blue I own a lawn mower Can you swim?

What do you call two homosexuals in fancy hats? It depends, you have to ask their names first.

Hey guys wanna here a joke? Never mind it was a gay joke but f**k it.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dumb jokes, now shut up.

Roses are red Violets are blue What was I saying? Oh yeah, your adopted.

Why couldn't the man reach the police on his phone after his leg was hacked off by a serial killer? He had AT&T as a service provider.

what do a midget and a dwarf have in common? they both die by the age of 25 due to genetic failures.

Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

why don't you make like a tree. and get out of here

why cant blondes water ski.......... because whenever they split their legs they feel somthing wet

How are you supposed to breath with no air? um jorden sparks you dont?

*ring ring ring* hello? This is a robbery... Dum dum dum.... (hangs up) *beep beep beep*

Why did Doris fall down the stairs? Because she was a stupid, uncoordinated old hag with no control over her bladder.

Why did Chuck Norris go to Chuck E Cheeses? Because his friend wanted to go.

What rhymes with turtle? Rape

What do you get when you cross a lion with a rhinoceros? A trip to the hospital and animal cruelty charges.

Want to see a funny movie? -Watch Schindler's List

How many atheists does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

R2-D2 is quite possibly the most vulgar character on the set of Star Wars. Every word he says is bleeped out.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I don't have cancer, but you do. Love, your doctor.

My Girlfriend

How many jews died in a gas chamber? None because the holocaust is a myth.

Q: What do you call a robot in a concert? A: Electric fan

Chuck Norris will die sometime in the future.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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