What did the bird say to the squirrel? Chirp

thumb_up thumb_down +11

When life gives you lemons,you say thank you.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He didn't have the necessary mental ability or muscle structure to complete said task.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q:whats the diffrence between a mexican and a deer A:one is a mexican and the other one is a deer

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q:what has legs but may never walk? A: a table

thumb_up thumb_down +11

onranges are orange bananas are yellow and apples are red/green ................... and im ................. PINK (lw/kc)

thumb_up thumb_down +9

knock knock who's there? al-Qaeda

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How many women does it take to change a lightbulb? None, let the bitch cook in the dark.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Your mother is so ugly that your father no lomger finds her attractive

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Holy ****, I'm in heaven.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Knock knock! Who's there? The police, we found your cat's body on the side of the road.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

how do you call a boomerang that does not come back? - a stick

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Two blonds are racing. Who wins? The first one to pass he finish line.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

An Arab walks into a bar. He then blows up the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

what do you call a bear on a unicycle? improbable.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Susie has Autism

thumb_up thumb_down +5

stuff and dogs {()}

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends on gender and environment, but a fully grown, adult, male polar bear weighs from 800 to 1600 pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I have read the Terms of Service.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How many jews died in a gas chamber? None because the holocaust is a myth.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

There was an old man from Limerick. He was of scottish ancestry and nearing his 76th birthday.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? A: You can't wear cleats on a trampoline.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I was on Skype with a girl yesterday and she asked "Do you want to see something?" "No," I said "my mom's in the room and she might get a bad interpretation." "I really want you to see this." She said. " No, my mom's still in the room, she'll think I'm weird if you turn out the lights." "Darn I really wanted to see your glow in the dark snuggie."

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops