What happens when you put a bunch of Republicans in a room together? They form a caucus.

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Why did the gorilla leave the zoo? He didn't, he was released.

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I'm gay.

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Q: Why did the young boy run away from girls and screamed that they had cooties? A: That's what little boys do. He also has an abusive home life

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When does 1=17? How many schizophrenics does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

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A blind guy sees a nuclear bomb.... he dies.

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Knock knock *No one was home*

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What did the patient say when the doctor told him he had aids? "Oh my god. Are you sure?"

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roses are black, violets are black, im sleeping

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What's green and has wheels? A chinese race car driver.

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It's kind of hard to die when you're in a freezer.

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How many doctors does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

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There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

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Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

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antijokes

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How many feminist does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to screw it in, the other to suck a dick.

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Why was the man arrested? He had brutally stabbed 398 people in a 10 hour period.

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Why did the baby cross the road? His parents were drug addicts, and didn't pay him any attention.

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How much is an abortion? A life

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Timmy heard that Red Bull gives you wings. He drank one and waited. No wings. He drank another and waited. No wings. Timmy drank 3 cases of Red Bull trying to get wings. Timmy died. The end.

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How do you escape a vicious tiger? You cleverly create a distraction so the tiger's focus is not on you. Then, you quickly run away because the tiger doesn't know you are leaving.

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your moms so fat... she ways like 300 pounds.

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How did the blonde screw in a lightbulb? She didn't, she fell and broke her neck and went to a hospital. Thus you should not laugh.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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