Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a whore, Let's have sex.

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A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by it surroundings, and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Why was the orphan crying? His parents were dead and his future was uncertain.

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What's samller than a table but can't go under it? A baby with hay fork in his back.

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What do you call a deaf person? You don't they can't hear you.

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Why did Rose throw the clock out the window? Because she's a moron.

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Q: What is green, blue, white and red? A: They're colors

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there are 4 men in a bar talking about how well their sons are doing with their lives. But one man goes to the toilet. So the first man says 'my son is doing really well he is the head of a airline company and for christmas he got his bestfriend a plane.' The second man says' My son is doing really well he has his own car brand and for christmas he got his bestfriend a brand new car.' The third man says' Well my son is doing really well, He owns his own housing estate business and for christmas he bought his best friend a 250'000 sq foot mansion. The fourth man comes out of the toilet and all the three men say ' We are talking about how our sons are doing in their lives so what about yours.' The fourth man goes' well my son is gay but its not that bad because for christmas his three boyfriends got him a new plane, a new car and a 250'000 sq foot mansion.'

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Why did the black man walk into KFC? He was terribly hungry and had a reasonable amount of currency with him to purchase food for his well being.

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Christopher Walken to a bar.

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What is funny about 9/11. Nothing, it was a tragic day for the world.

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It is green and it is attached to a fence? Green paint

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A man walks into the local grocery store on his way to work. He stops by the pastry section to buy a bagel. As he is paying, the cashier says "and here's some blueberries, they're complimentary." The man looks at the blueberries expectantly. When they don't say anything he looks up, feeling foolish, pays for his bagel and heads off to work as a partner in a lawyer firm.

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how much dub would a dubstep step if a dubstep could step dub? purple

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Patrick is gay

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25

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The Charlotte bobcats.

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How did the blond die? Substance abuse

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Romney 2012

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What's meaner than taking a candy from a baby? Tossing the baby of a cliff

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your momma is so stupid she failed math class

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i have 2 penises

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why did hannibal lector butter up the teacher? he wanted to get a good grade. he also wanted to eat her

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Why do cows have tails? Because my pet rock stopped breathing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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