Violets are red Roses are blue I scrrewed that up Now can i screw you?

What's worse than losing your job? Getting thrown into the sun.

knock knock hows there sorry but i was to lazy to think of an ending

Your Mother is so pretty that she does not need make-up.

What's the difference between a ferrari and a sack of babies? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

Wanna hear a joke womens rights

tim rafter died no one cared

Why was 9 afraid of 1? Because when dialed together, an emergency call was most likely coming and 9 is very sensitive to those types of moments

Hey, I want to because you are really sweet and deserve it, and damn you are hot, but thats secondary in your case, in every case actually, otherwise I would just be doing it with meat whose soul and thoughts I hate/dislike/detest/etc, and that is not who I am. Once huh? I mean I said night/day/shower/breakfast table... Not so sure I can last for that long with a girl as hot and sweet as you for that long. Kidding, hey, best friend huh? Wow, I mean that`s really sweet, and you are really a special friend to me, but uh, to be honest, best friend? I barely know you... I hate this part of myself, I am blunt with that honesty thing, I may just have insulted you, but you know, I also need to be able to live with myself If I am going to enjoy life.

A UNIX guru walks in to a restaurant and asks for day's special. Waiter responds "tartar steak." UNIX guru thinks that "steak.tar.tar just doesn't make any sense" and responds "I'll just have tar steak."

Did you know, that every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes?

Why can't Billy ride the bicycle? Billy's a fish.

whats difference between a bench and a mexican? a mexican isnt a bench

What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone!

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because chickens can move and the road just happened to be in its path.

Get in the van

Q: My mom's getting really old and It's starting to get hard to shop for her. Any ideas? A: You should get her a coffin.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

what do you call a dear with no I? No I dear

Why did little Johnny eat his homework? Because his family is very poor and he rarely eats.

Knock knock who's there? ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! dislike me!

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?", laughs at his own joke, then calls animal control.

Why couldn't the college student get on the internet? He can't afford a computer.

How do you escape a vicious tiger? You cleverly create a distraction so the tiger's focus is not on you. Then, you quickly run away because the tiger doesn't know you are leaving.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...