Whats big white and can't climb trees? A Fridge. Whats red and bad for your teeth? A Brick.

There's a fair in a small town in Scotland. In this fair is a sheep judging contest. There are 3 sheep lined up for judging. The judge looks at the first sheep and says "Wow! This is the most beautiful sheep I've ever seen! This sheep just might win!" Then he proceeds to the second sheep. He says "This sheep is even more beautiful than the first! This sheep just might win!" Then he goes to the third sheep. He says "UGH! This is the ugliest most disgusting sheep I've ever seen! There is no way this sheep will win this contest!" And the sheep looks up at him and says, "You think I'm ugly? Well I'm not."

Why did Cam newton win the heisman? Wait Cam Newton won the heisman?

Yo mama's so poor she is on welfare.

Who're you gonna' call when you're apartments being ravaged by ghosts? Your doctor, for you might have schizophrenia.

Want to hear the best joke ever? Me too.

What did the guy with Alzheimer's say to his.... Wait, I forgot the joke

:(Sneeze) :Bless You :Thank You! :Mention it :Thank You!

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Whats the difference between a boy scout and a Jew? Boyscouts come back from camp.

What happened to the boy who got everything he ever wanted? He turned into a gluttonous and greedy adult who eagerly spent all of his money and subsequently died alone.

What did the priest say to the young African American male? Good to see you again Robert. That community service we did at Morris Park last Friday should give a real boost to the infrastructure of the already stellar community we live in.

Guess what? What? Nothing.

What's the similiarity between a black person and a bicycle? They both work best with chains.

what did barrack obama say to the jew osama bin ladins a bitch

F@ck me in the ass until I say STOP. Before we start, can you please ducktape my mouth?

why did ben perve on the 5 year old girl he is a pedofile

Whats worse that stubbing your toe? Death.

How come fat people drive cars? It takes to long to ride a bike to McDonalds

Whats the best way to take the leaves off the tree? - Cut down the tree-

Q: How many leprechauns does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Leprechauns aren't real.

An Irishman walks into a bar. His alcoholism is tearing his family apart.

What did the cabbage say to the cabbage? I dont know ask the leafy guy.... >_

What did the chicken do before it crossed the road? Looked both ways and then crossed with caution while looking out for oncoming vehicles.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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