Roses are brown, violets are brown, who is s***ing in my garden?

Knock knock GET OUTTA HERE! Jesus Christ dude I just came for some eggs!....

The WNBA.

Did you hear that Hellen Keller went driving? Now she's also paralyzed.

What did the black man, chinese man, and mexican man all have in common? They all happened to enjoy cantaloupe.

A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walks briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

in the begining... god made some stuff

Kittens.

Why can't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because Jimmy has no legs. Why doesn't he have any legs? Because he's a potato.

A welsh guy walks into a pub. This something any average guy would do.

-Knock knock -Come on in!

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into an apple and slicing your mouth on a razorblade

knock knock, who's there? you goodbye

crime in multi story is wrong on so many levels!

A penguin was waddling along one day and saw a seal.. The seal stood up and procceded to talk and jump and even twirled around... The penguin realized this was impossible for a seal to be doing this so he hopped on his unicycle and just rode home because he was going to be late for his piano recital

1,2 Freddy's Coming For You 3'4 Better Lock Your Doors 5'6 Grab Your Crucifix 7'8 Stay Up Late 9'10 Never Sleep Again Bonus 11'12 He's Gonna See You In Hell

Need homeless tips? Get A Job.

What do you call a blond harvesting penuts a penut farmer.

A man goes to lie down on a couch. His wife walks by and sees him, and asks, "what are you doing?" to which he replies, "lying down"

whats stupid and likes dumb jokes? you.

Why did the man stay in the basement? Because he was addicted to pornography and it was tearing his family apart. Eventually he was unable to tell the diffidence between fantasy and reality and sexually assaulted his 13 year old niece.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's a woman.

the chicken whent boomand then died

Why couldn't the women drive? She was dead

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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