A chinese man, a white man, and a black man are all driving on the freeway. They see each other and wave as they all know each other, and then they focus on the road and drive carefully.

Obama-Care

What did the homeless guy do when he saw a bucket? He peed in it

A black man and a black woman are in a car, who's driving? The police.

What's worse than a dead man?  2 dead men

The phantom menace is the best star wars movie

I just found out that you can dislike or like something by clicking the thumbs up or down

Knock knock. Hello dear. Come in.

what do you do when a woman tells you no? cut her tongue out

Why did the chicken cross the road? I dunno, that's why I asked you.

Why was the hamster not on his wheel? Because he had a stroke.

Yo moma is so fat. yep.

Why did the lizard turn blue? He was low on oxygen.

What did the African boy get for Christmas? Nothing because he celebrates Kwanza.

What is this, a center for ants? No, this is a model of the building proportionally smaller than the one we will be building.

Your Mom

Your Mother is so pretty that she does not need make-up.

Q:What kind of pizza did the World Trade Center order? A:Two Plains

Roses are black, violets are black, i am blind!

There are two horses in a stable. They were just talking about the weather and other normal things. Suddenly, the dog ran in. "HELP, HELP!!!" The dog screamed. Farmer Brandy got stuck in the tractor!!! The horses said, "HOLY SHIT........... A TALKING DOG!!!!"

Roses are red, violets are blue, cheeseburger.

Two strangers are sitting at a bar having a drink. One is a young, fat, red-headed guy named Fred. The other is an elderly grey-haired man. After a while, Fred turns to the old man and awkwardly asks: "Excuse me sir would ya' mind givin me some advice? There's this girl who has sat next to me on the bus every morning for the past three months. She's the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. She always smiles and winks at me. I wannna ask her on a date but every time I go to do it I freeze. I just don't know what to say. I'm sorry to bother you, but I'm falling for this girl and I don't know what in the world to do. Any tips?" The old man continues to sit quietly, slowly sipping his drink. After a while the old man looks at Fred. "Hmmm" says the old man, as he thinks over Fred's question. "What is your name son?" He asks Fred. "It's Fred sir," replies Fred. "Hmmm," the old man says again as he continues to think over Fred's question. The old man then stands up, takes out a gun, and shoots Fred in the face. Fred never saw it coming.

what do we want a cure for turrets! when do we want it C U NT !!!

Why did the gorilla leave the zoo? He didn't, he was released.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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