a man walked out of church and said F***!

Where did Lucy go after being hit by a train? Well, the results of this question are somewhat difficult to pinpoint, but here is a generalized ratio model. 47% of Lucy went underneath the trains wheels and was left behind, crushed into the railway sleepers. 33% was thrown aside and discarded around the SIDES of the track. 19% was carried on the front of the train, into the next station where it fell off as soon as the train stopped. 1% was found in Mount Everest.

YOLO

Why didn't the 13 year old Black boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

Whats worse than than Holocaust.? Finding two worms in your apple.

ballsack

A guy is playing cod

What's black and white and red all over? A cow being processed

What olympic event is Kosovo best known for getting gold? Kosovo is the world's newest country and therefore does not yet have complete international recognition.

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

Why couldn't the mexican feed his family? Because a large percent of mexican immigrants in the United States do not have jobs due to dicrimination against illegal immigrants crossing the soutern border, thus rendering them more vunerable to unemployment is that is vastly present in the United States.

Obama-Care

I feel like am motherf***ing stuck in this dock and it makes me wana quack like what the hell is THAT!

What did the prostitute say to the cop? What? I can suck your dick for free Mr. Officer

Q:What kind of pizza did the World Trade Center order? A:Two Plains

How do magnets work?

Roses are red, violets are blue, cheeseburger.

Make an effort in life whenever you want. Fight trough life when you got no other choice.

Poop

How do racist jokes start? Generally with a racially insensitive stereotype.

Your mom is so fat the only time she saw 90210 was on a scale.

What do you call 100 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean 100 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean

Knock Knock Come in

No

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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