Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

Why can't Billy ride the bicycle? Billy's a fish.

what do you call a dear with no I? No I dear

A man runs into a psychiatrist's office and screams, "You gotta help me doc! I just killed seven people in my office building!"

How many Aodhan's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Aodhan's da has already screwed all the lightbulbs...

wait am i supposed to right the joke down here

How much is an abortion? A life

Why did little Johnny eat his homework? Because his family is very poor and he rarely eats.

What happens when Batman Robin and Wonder woman go on a date? Somebody isn't getting laid.

What's black, over twelve inches long, and has a hard time fitting in tight spaces? my double stroller.

Yo mamma is so fat, when Dracula bit her, he got type 2 diabetes.

Ever heard about the gray pipes that ran along the walls? Those pipes transmit gas. Gas killed the jews. You sick fucker.

What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

So there was a pirate, he got shot in the back. And when he got shot he turned to his freind (fellow pirate) and said i have been shot and there is a pretty good chance i will die.

what do you call a martial arts instructor with a medical degree who's name is Richard? Craig... just kidding, Richard

What's sad about 3 Black Guys in a Camero? It was my car...

What did the husband tell his obese wife? I love you honey

What did the black man, chinese man, and mexican man all have in common? They all happened to enjoy cantaloupe.

Whats Asian and longer than 2 inches? chopsticks.

Why couldn't Maria play Softball? She was born without legs.

What's big and purple? Something that's big and purple

roses are red violets are blue kiss my ass you god damb goe..

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

What's the difference between a women's running team and a band of pygmies? Quite a lot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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