Why couldn't Maria play Softball? She was born without legs.

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roses are red violets are blue kiss my ass you god damb goe..

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What did the man say to his wife when he bought a dog? I bought a dog.

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What's the difference between a women's running team and a band of pygmies? Quite a lot.

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GRAAAAAAAAAAAR.

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How many jews can you fit in a car? That depends on the volume of the car and the size of the people involved - different cars are of different sizes and can fit a different number of people. For instance, you could probably fit more than 20 midget jews in a van but you could probably not fit as many overweight jews in a coupé. However if you put some effort into getting as many standard sized people, in this case jews for reasons unknown, into a standard size sedan you should be able to fit about seven or eight in the car itself and one in the trunk, making a total of nine or ten.

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A man goes to lie down on a couch. His wife walks by and sees him, and asks, "what are you doing?" to which he replies, "lying down"

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how many fish does it take to turn on a lightbulb None, lightbulbs dont work in the ocean

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Roses are green Violets are yellow I have mental problems Doobah haga Blakatrabbit

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Human is to breast as breast is to nipple as nipple is to milk as milk is to HIV as HIV is to AIDS as AIDS is to death as death is to heaven or hell as heaven or hell is to Jesus or the Devil as Jesus is to God as God is to the Universe

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What Starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn.

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Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: It varies largely by hipster, the same way it does with any other person.

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Knock knock (No one is home)

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Uh, erm, uh...I don't know.

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Adam Sandler.

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What do you tell a girl with 2 black eyes? You should ice those to preven swelling aron the eyes

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Roses are blue, Roses are red. Give me your money, Or I'll cut off your head.

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Patrick is gay

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People talk about how there grandparents was in the holocaust well my grandpa was to he died. How he fell off the guard tower.

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cms.......?????

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RULES: #1) have fun #2) safety first

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so he says "aaahhh". then i threw a fridge at him

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What happened to the latino and asian man in math class when they had a test? They both recieved exceptional scores as they both helped each other study the night before.

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You wanna hear a clean joke? I took a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? I slipped in mud. Wanna hear an even dirtier joke? Bubbles is a guy..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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