What are the things that define you? The things that define you.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Blood is red also Nothing else is blue

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American Idol

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What did the great political leader say in order to calm the riot. There were no definable words. He merely screamed as the riot swallowed him and tore him apart.

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Not at all, I find your perception of things like that quite pleasing, you obviously care about me, and care about your wife, that's nice.

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What's black and hangs from my tree? A black man. I am a racist.

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potato farming

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Why did the young woman have a sore vagina? Because she just experienced intercourse for the first time and her partner was not as gentle as he should've been, given the situation.

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Why did the lady drop her shopping Because she ran into coles

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what did one mexican say to the other Hi.

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Why does Magic Johnson always use extra large condoms? Because he's got a giant dick and HIV.

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What do you call a women with two black eyes? Someone trapped in the cycle of violence that is domestic abuse. The few friends and family members she still speaks with tell she should leave. They don't know about the last time she threatened to leave him, when he held a gun to her throat and screamed "You try an leave me I'll kill you and your precious god damn babies!" Now she suffers silently for fear of what he might do to her family, but is increasingly worried about the way her husband has begun looking at their 13 year old daughter. Every night she kneels at the foot of her bed and prays for death, over the sounds of her own sobbing and her husbands drunken rage. Also she is a slow learner.

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What do you call 400 black men rolling down a hill? 400 black men rolling down a hill.

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You know what's sad about the Special Olympics? Even of you win, your still retarded.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass...I was just lying about the wheels.

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Your as much use as Anne Frank's drum kit.

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ollie is a fag so are you

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What do you put on top of salad? Salad Dressing.

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A Black a Jew and a Pollack walk in to the bar bartender says "how may i help you gentlemen"

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Q: Why did little Johnny not like little Suzie? A: He was a homosexual.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape her abusive father

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What is worse than getting a paper cut? Your whole family dying to MERS in Peru before you were old enough to remember any of them.

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Person 1: It's your birthday? Person 2: Yeah! Person 1: Oh.

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Knock knock.* Who is it? The police. We have news that your daughter was molested and will never been seen again for the man who stole her has takin' her out of our jurisdiction.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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