how did the horse fall into the river? he sliped

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A man had a terminal illness. He died a few months after he was diagnosed.

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What's worse than nine dead babies hanging in a tree? One dead baby hanging in nine trees.

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ROSS G IS OBESE

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what is the differents between a baby and a watermelon one is fun to hit the other is just a watermelon

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What do you call a kid with a peg leg and an eye patch? Names

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What did the racist slave owner do when his slave refused to complete his task? Asked him nicely until the task was completed.

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If John has 32 candy bars and he eats 28, whAt does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Get in the car

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Why did the baby cross the road. It was stapled to the chicken.

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Banana(s)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing..

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Why did the chandelier fall on the little boy? Hell if I know, the only person who saw it got hit by a chandelier and died.

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What's the fastest animal on earth? An Ethiopian chicken.

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2

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There is a secret society known as Grandma Elbow. What happened to the boy who tried to leave it? All of his limbs were ripped off and fed to a man eating shark by the name of Nigel Tommy Baker. It didn't hurt that much because the boy was forced into eating the waste products of a donkey before this happened. NEVER LEAVE GRANDMA ELBOw!

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Why was the asian guy's eyes slanted? Your question is a very valid one that most people often wonder, but never really ask. It's called an epicanthal fold...please, NOT "slanted eyes". Many people consider this to be a derogatory description of the descendents or those of Eastern Asia (as do I, being half Korean), but most people are unaware of this and say it anyway. I'll assume you didn't know this. :) The epicanthal fold (what we have) is something that all babies are born with, but those who may not be of Eastern Asian origin will eventually lose. The purpose of this "fold" is to protect the eyes from extreme sunlight and cold weather. Most people of the this part of Asia originated in Mongolia where the weather conditions were very cold and harsh. Also, with most of this population, you'll notice that there exists some extra padding below the eyes as well. With all that white snow and the sunlight reflecting off of it, don't you think with time our bodies would develop some sort of defense for one of our most valued senses--our sight? It makes sense, doesn't it? Also, notice, that the farther south you travel in Eastern Asia the "rounder" the eye gets (their is less evidence of the epicanthal fold), since the climate gets warmer the farther south you go. Evolution, baby. So, Eastern Asian eyes are NOT really slanted. They just appear to be. Instead they just have that extra fold above the eyes that make them appear "thinner", if you will. If you want to sound halfway intelligent, please don't use the description "slanted eyes" anymore, since this will only make you seem like somewhat of a bigot (racist). (You might say it around the wrong person one day.) Sorry, but I'm just trying to give you some good advice. I hope I helped.

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What's funny about being adopted? Your parents never loved you

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What's the most annoying thing in the world? Yourself. (Your friends are saying it too, behind your back)

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Why do cows have tails? Because my pet rock stopped breathing.

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A: Ask me if im a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

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how do u get a nun off the bottom of a cruise ship you untie her

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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