Why did the man have cold feet on his wedding day? The wedding was outside in the winter.

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My friends are like trampolines I have none

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Why did Susie fall off of the swing? She was hit by an asteroid.

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George W. Bush

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, WTF is this, i gotta take a piss.

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Roses are grey, violets are grey, im a dog

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Guess what's funny? People voting for their own Anti joke.

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The Economy

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Wanna hear a joke? Me too.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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Humpty Dumpty didn't fall I pushed him

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What's has 4 wheels But ain't a blue car A red car

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Communism

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Why is your Mom so ugly? She was born that way

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What is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 1 dead baby in 10 trash cans

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What does chuck norris do at 4 o clock in the morning ? Sleep

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a duck walks in to a Chinese restaurant and the cut his head off

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape her abusive father

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If through some strange space-time paradox, Chuck Norris ever had to fight himself, Chuck Norris would-- What am I saying, that would never happen!

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Why do Africans live in slums Because they have aids

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Your Mom

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Write your own

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Why did the girl hang up on her boyfriend? Because the roof collapsed on her.

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How can an iPhone play music? It has a built in iPod installed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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