Roses are Brown Violets are Brown I hate everyone on antijoke that steals what I write I fisted a cows butt hole.

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How do you fit 100 babies into a bucket? With a blender. How do you get them out again? With Doritos.

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Q: how many Pollocks does it take to paint a house? A: 100. 99 to spin the house and 1 to hold the paint brush

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How is the difference between a door? Its a chicken, because they don't have wheels.

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What did Sarah Palin say to her daughter on Christmas? Merry Christmas

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Why did the little girl fall down She was shot in the leg

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What did the man say to his wife? Go make me a sandwich!

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Why did the baby cross the road. It was stapled to the chicken.

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From SpongeBob SquarePants "Hey Patrick, wanna know what's funnier than 24??" - SpongeBob "What?" - Patrick " 25!!!!" - SpongeBob There are a lot of things that are funnier than 24 though.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Women's rights

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Knock Knock, Who's there? The Police. *No Answer* The police then give the S.W.A.T the signal, bust down the door, and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door was Carlos Pedrouez, a serial killer, meth addict who has been apart of the Arizona sex slave trade for over a decade. The world can now sleep softly. The door was also red.

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Why did the little boy die? Because he had cancer.

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A shark walks into a bar and the bartender says why the long face. The shark replies i dont have cancer just a terrible drinking problem.

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This is my rifle, this is my gun, one is for shooting, the other is decorative.

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knock knock your gay

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The economy sucks. REM broke up. A man killed himself.

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you know what they say about people with big feet, they have big feet...

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Get in the car

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If god gives you lemons You find a new god.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Pen. Pen who? Pen is blue. The pen is blue. THE GOD DAMN PEN IS BLUE!!!!

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How do women learn to drive? Drivers ED.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Farmer Ned chased his chickens before they laid their eggs, because he likes his eggs scrambled.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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