How do you catch a squirrel? Use a live, humane trap, and release it back into the wild afterwards.

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Roses are red violets are blue I have a pie would you like some?

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Do you want to hear a joke? Well, I do too.

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Your mom is so fat that she sat on a rock.

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why couldnt helen keller drive? because shes a woman.

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What did the downs syndrome say when he walked into the bar? 'nbgzsbjndjgtbnsuzhvcghvdhjdtv.' He has downs syndrome

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What do you call a black person trying to swim? Wet.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who, Your Doctor, you have 5 months to live

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You can lead a horse to water, but you can't put it in a basket.

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Two blonds are racing. Who wins? The first one to pass he finish line.

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What walks like a duck, talks like a duck, but doesn't look like a duck? A horse named Quackie

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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BARRACK OBAMA.............WHAT A JOKE!!!!!

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"knock knock" "who's there" nobody answered cus it was a bunch of little shits playing knock a door run

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Why did the woman make a sandwich? She was hungry

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Why did the lady drop her shopping Because she ran into coles

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Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says “I’ll have some H2O.” The second says “I’ll have some H2O too.” Then he dies.

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Icecream

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Q:how do you brighten up a room? A:you turn on the lamps

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Why did the man jump off the bridge. Because he found his beloved wife cheating on him with his life-long friend that he meet when they both where in pre-school.

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what do you call a bear on a unicycle? improbable.

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CHIIIICKKIIIIIIIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Why don't you have a seat, over there?

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http://www.ladsta.com

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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