A hot girl walks by a boy and he stares at her as she walks past. She see's him and asks "What are you looking at?", to which the boy replied "Oh I'm sorry. You happened to look familiar and I thought 'Perhaps I've met this person before. School? No. Work? No. I then concluded I've never seen you before and then you turned around and asked me what I was looking at".

Wolf Pussy

what is brown and sticky? a stick

When Jesus came back from the dead the first thing he said was "It was just a prank bro!"

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well no one really knows for sure

Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Have you seen the size of their fingers!?!?!

"hey those pancakes look pretty good." "thats a cat steve."

What did mr. Mackey say to his class. It's easy mkay

What did the man say to his wife when he bought a dog? I bought a dog.

GRAAAAAAAAAAAR.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Joseph Kony. Give me your children.

how many fish does it take to turn on a lightbulb None, lightbulbs dont work in the ocean

Roses are green Violets are yellow I have mental problems Doobah haga Blakatrabbit

What should I name my dog?

A priest, a rabbi and a captain are in a sinking ship. The rabbi says let's save the children. The captain says f*ck the children. The priest days do we have time.

Human is to breast as breast is to nipple as nipple is to milk as milk is to HIV as HIV is to AIDS as AIDS is to death as death is to heaven or hell as heaven or hell is to Jesus or the Devil as Jesus is to God as God is to the Universe

Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: It varies largely by hipster, the same way it does with any other person.

Knock knock (No one is home)

Adam Sandler.

What do you tell a girl with 2 black eyes? You should ice those to preven swelling aron the eyes

Roses are blue, Roses are red. Give me your money, Or I'll cut off your head.

why did the chicken cross the road Kill yoself

You wanna hear a clean joke? I took a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? I slipped in mud. Wanna hear an even dirtier joke? Bubbles is a guy..

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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