Whats the difference between pizza and Jews Pizzas dont scream when their put in the oven

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A man walks into the corner of a table and bruises his leg. The bruise continues to be there for about 3 weeks.

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when do you go to heaven? Never, it doesn't exist.

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Your argument is invalid, but I will allow you your opinion nonetheless.

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What did the tourist in Africa get? A souvenior.

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what is fat and ugly. fat and ugly people

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What is the difference between a Ferrari and a dead hooker? One is a car and one is a human being.

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why did the mans hair start to get shorter the barber was shaving it!

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ROSS G IS OBESE

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how do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the brake

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Why do black people cuss so much? Because f#*% you.

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What do people do in France when they are hungry? Get something to eat.

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I still remember the last words my grandpa said to me before he kicked the bucket. He said, "Hey. how far do you think I can kick this bucket."

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Who broke into the village's homes and smashed all of the vases? Link did.

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What did Helen Keller's parents do to punish her? They gave her a stern talking to and then grounded her for a couple days.

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Q: How do you get a clown to stop smiling? A: Hit it with an axe

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I always tell people " I have the heart of a child! " Then I continue "It's in a jar on my desk"

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Why did the black guy go to jail, because he did illegal stuff.

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Why couldn't JImmy walk to school? A:Jimmy is in a wheelchair.

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How do you fit 100 babies into a bucket? With a blender. How do you get them out again? With Doritos.

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What did Sarah Palin say to her daughter on Christmas? Merry Christmas

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How is the difference between a door? Its a chicken, because they don't have wheels.

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Q: how many Pollocks does it take to paint a house? A: 100. 99 to spin the house and 1 to hold the paint brush

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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