Why dose not the cat bark? Because it's a cat!

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What did the mute say to the deaf man? Nothing. He's a mute.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What animal is green and eats a green rockeater? A green green rockeater eater. What animal is green and eats a green green rockeater eater? A frog.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Wy did Bryan eet his Dumbelllle? Anderson fell asleep again

thumb_up thumb_down +20

The President, the Pope, and a small child are in a plane when the pilot announces that they are about to crash. The plane hits the ocean. They quickly remember that there is a life jacket under their seats and they promptly put it on, but wait to inflate it (by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs) it until after exiting the cabin.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why was the man so unhappy. he died

thumb_up thumb_down +18

yo mamas so fat, she started working out

thumb_up thumb_down +18

there's two nuns cycling down a cobbled street. one nun says:ooo iv'e never been this way before! the other nun says:i'm not surprised there's roadworks and a diversion!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A man in a bar says "I'm drunk", immediately 10 men take of their clothes

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why didn't the 34 year old woman fit into some size 14 jeans? Because she was size 16.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

penis that is all

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why does Susie fall off the swing? I shot her in the head with a pistol.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you call a Chinese man in a cage full of Ostridges? A zoo worker.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the chicken fall off the tree? It was stapled to the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Tim's gay.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. why did the frog fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the monkey,

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his head.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you call a black man driving a car? A driver.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Three blondes walk into a community college.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the little kid use pillows at night? Because he was constipated.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did Lady Gaga say to Justin Timberlake? "I love the Backstreet Boys!" Justin Timberlake Replied with a Bazooka.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the penis say to the vagina? Nothing, genitalia can't speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops