How do you know when a guy wants to have sex with you? When he rapes you

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like my drawing of a white person?

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minced oaths

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Romney 2012

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What did the mute say to the deaf man? Nothing. He's a mute.

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? -she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzy

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knock knock. who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant

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Unflushed Shit...

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what kind of person screaws in a light blub........ a electrician

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Why did the bride get a refrigerator for her wedding? Because it is a very nice present

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What do you call a Colombian who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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What's the fastest animal on earth? An Ethiopian chicken.

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Why can't Hank swim? Hank is a rock

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A man walks into a bar. End of story.

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Fuck her

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What is the diffrence between a guy and pie? The pie taste like fruit somethimes

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Whats worse than getting in a 30 MPH car accident? Getting in a 40 MPH car accident.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and and no legs in front of a door? A: A quadruple amputee.

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Why did a monkey fall out of a tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of a tree? Gravity. Why did the third monkey fall out of a tree? He was stapled to the second monkey.

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A bear walks into a bar and says to the barman "I'll have a pint of................ beer please." The barman says "why the big pause?"

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Knock Knock No one answers....

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Happiness is just at the end of the road... Just take a look at how long that road is yeah i wouldnt even try

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops