Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was born with the disorders of being blind and deaf. For any human, having blindness and deafness makes driving a near impossible task.

What is one thing you can't buy at the store? Toast

What's sad about 3 Black Guys in a Camero? It was my car...

how do you fit 100 jews in a car? 2 in the front seat, 3 in the back seat, and 95 in the ash tray.

How do you get a blonde to drown herself? Isolate her in an aqueous environment

Why did the boy eat his homework? Because he already ate his dog.

Roses are red, Violets are blueish, Without Hitler, We'd all be Jewish.

what has two legs and bleeds? half a dog

What's the difference between me and you? Dr. Dre

Why did Helen Kellers dog run away? You would too if your name was Hjshdvcyehbretafvvba.

Whats worse than getting negative 5 on your calculus test? Coming up positive on your Chlamydia test.

What did you say? I don't know.

What do you call a cat with no legs and an inverted anus? Nothing, you're to horrified to speak.

Why did the blonde buy a condom? Because she had a penis.

Need homeless tips? Get A Job.

why did the chicken cross the road?? to go shopping for some aspirin because one of his children recently developed a raging headache and it was only logical for him to go to the pharmacy that was conveniantly placed across the road.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

How many perverts does it take to screw a lightbulb?

Jokes are funny.

Roses are blue, Roses are red. Give me your money, Or I'll cut off your head.

Why doesn't Superman eat peanuts? He doesn't like them

Roses are red Violets are blue This line doesn't rhyme Neither does this one.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

i like my women like i like my coffee...big boobs

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...