Hitler is my role model

so a guy walks into the bar...i forget the rest of the jokes but your mother is a whore.

9/11

I love my new microwave. It comes with a list that tells just how long to cook things. Now i know how long to cook a baby for

Emma Brown..I'd tap that shit Dylan xoxo

a horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" and the horse says "my wife has terminal cancer.

A man walks into a bar. Jeremy Lin congratulates him for being a person.

What do you get when you cross a chicken with a beagle? An abomination.

Knock knock? Who's there? The WNBA. LOL

What is the difference between a black guy and an asian? They are both black, except the asian

"hey" said an elephant to another elephant... "why can I talk?" the other elephan did not reply because it is normal and cannot speak or understand the first elephant. And a man near by thinks he's dreaming so he strips down and runs around naked to be tazed on his left testicle an the. Falls into the crocodile enclosure. But they pay no attention because they are docile after being in the zoo so long. But he did land on his balls and is crying.

How do you kill a blue elephant? How? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? How? You hold it's nose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a orange elephant? How? You can't, they don't exist. How do you kill a white elephant? How? You tickle it till it turns pink, then you hold it's noose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

I'm not wearing underwear Why not Cause I have built in underwear

what's your favorite soccer team? liverpool

what do you call a sock that is no longer white a dirty sock

how do you fit 100 jews in a car? 2 in the front seat, 3 in the back seat, and 95 in the ash tray.

Whats Asian and longer than 2 inches? chopsticks.

Why did the rabbit like to wear shoes? It doesn't.

Why is Ellen so funny? Because she is a comedian.

Whats worse than getting negative 5 on your calculus test? Coming up positive on your Chlamydia test.

A welsh guy walks into a pub. This something any average guy would do.

Why didn't the Mammoth go to school? Because his species went extinct before the development of organized education. And he's also a Mammoth.

How do you know a dude is dead? He doesn't breath, he has no color in the face and his heart has stoped.

What's meaner than taking a candy from a baby? Tossing the baby of a cliff

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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