Your mother is so fat that her doctor recommended that she exercise regularly and eat foods with nutritional value.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A: Ask me if im a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What does AIDS stand for? Acquired immune deficiency syndrome

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's the difference between Jews and boy scouts? Boy scouts come back from camp.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

dead babies

thumb_up thumb_down +25

There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Brian Singmaster. Look him up, he's cute.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

why do cats hate dogs? because cats were bullied by dogs in highschool.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza? One is a popular Italian food and the other is a human being.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A van drives into a car. An hour earlier, the man who was driving the van walked into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What has four legs, its yellow with black spots, and can run as fast as a Cheetah? Another Cheetah

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How many rats live in a llamas stomach? the cats pajamas

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A Jew, a Mexican, and a Black guy all walk into a bar. Bartender says: "Get the f*ck out."

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call a Mexican man in prison? A prison officer.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

what's the difference between a ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Obama enters a KKK meeting Obama: Oh sorry I thought this was the Kentucky Fried Chicken... the font was so small so... as he starts backing off scared... KKK: leader, of course Mr.President, feel free to come again anytime! Moral: Kings Knocking Ketchup is actually a nice place if you not unlike me enjoy ketchup...

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why aren't Anti Jokes funny? Cuz they're against my religion.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

what's white on top and black on the bottom? Society

thumb_up thumb_down +19

what's long, skin colored, erect, and limp? a finger.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do you call a dead black guy? A TERRIBLE CRIME

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Knock knock who is there ? i'm an orphaned, sir can you tell me why did you write who "is" instead of who's ?? because than i will have to use the (') key and its very far not to mention that i have to use the shift key do u want a pizza ? how much ? 50 cents ? get the hell out ? im not even in yet !

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a fox stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the boy cross the road? Because he was on his way to a friends house, after being kicked out yet again because his parents are homophobes and can't come to terms with his sexual preferences. When he got there, his friend was already asleep and he had to sleep in the gutter. He then got a cold and died because his immune system had been weakened by aids. His parents still didn't accept him, and didn't go to his funeral.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops