Why was the baseball player arrested after stealing a base? Because he pulled out a knife and stabbed the shortstop in the chest.

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A Poem that would be from a stocker: Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have a Gun Get in the Van and NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What did Bill go for his birthday? No where someone slashed his tires.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Joseph Kony. Give me your children.

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Why did Helen Kellers dog run away? You would too if your name was Hjshdvcyehbretafvvba.

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A priest, a rabbi and a captain are in a sinking ship. The rabbi says let's save the children. The captain says f*ck the children. The priest days do we have time.

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This is'nt a joke but like if it pisses you off when people comment on there own joke pretending to be someone else.

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Roses Are Red Lemons are sour, open up your legs and give me an hour

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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Mmmm, donuts

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what do you call four black people in a red sleeping bag? -a very snug sleeping bag as they can rarely fit more then one person comfortably

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A Blonde walks into a bar. She is an abusive relationship and is drinking her pain away.

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Three tomatoes are walking down the street... No wait, they're in my salad.

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whats the differnce between a baby and a dart board? dart boards dont bleed.

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What did the black man say to the other black man? Nothing, he was recently involved in a terrible car accident which he barely survived but lost the function of speech and was paralysed from the neck downwards. He is constantly in pain and desperately wants someone to kill him but has no way of communicating this so is forced to wait until his natural death.

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Loss of habitat.

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It is green and it is attached to a fence? Green paint

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ps3

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Why did the woman drop her baby? she had a stroke.

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What did Pikachu say to Ghandi? Pika Pika

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How do you kill a Russian? You shoot him with a gun.

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? A watermelon is edible.

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What's faster than a Mexican running away with your T.V.? An Airplane

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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