Knock knock It's open, come in.

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What does does an elephant and a grape have in common? They are both grapes except for the elephant.

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How can you tell Egyptian Bees are tired? When they put down their suitcases and yell "IM Tired!"

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Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducked.

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uhh i dont feel like writing a joke

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, sorry i gave you Herpes type 2.

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What's red and round? A red and round solid.

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what do you call four black people in a red sleeping bag? -a very snug sleeping bag as they can rarely fit more then one person comfortably

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Real jokes.

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Why wasn't the child breastfed? Because it's mother died while in the process of giving birth and the father does not have the necessary mammary glands to produce human milk for the young child.

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Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

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Microsoft Windows

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3 men- Greg-Allen-And James were on their way back from the bar. When the driver, Greg spun out of control. All of them died Instantly. Once they got to heaven, Jesus told them. " The better you were with Relationships, And loving just one person. The better Transportation you got." He bagan handing things out. " Well, Greg. Looks like you cheated on your most recent Girlfriend... Twice. You get a Bike." Next was Allen " Allen! Shame on you! You have dated 4 women at once! You get a Scooter!" And last was James. " James! You have stayed true to your wife! And all of your other ex- girlfriends. You get a Mustang!" Allen and Greg seen james, Sitting on his car, Upset. "Man! Whats wrong? You have the best thing you could get! I'd be happy!" James looks up and says " Thanks guys, But I just seen my Wife on A skateboard.."

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he lost his grip on the branch and was unable to reach another before reaching the ground.

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How do you get a bunch of Pokémon onto a bus? You tell them to ride a bus

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roses are red, violets are violet

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Why happened when a clothes line walked into a bar? He got hung over

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Black people are clen.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

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How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

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What do you call a black person trying to swim? Wet.

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lewis bedford

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what is red and looks like blue paint? red paint.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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