French people

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what's worse then being dumped? NOTHING

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What do you get when you mix red and yellow? Orange.

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God lets 3 people from hell come into heaven every year on chisrtmas based on how bad their last day on earth was. Its chistmas and god is standing a the gate of heaven and the first person comes up and god says, "Tell me what happend to you on your last day on earth" and the man says, " i thought my wife was cheating on me so i went to my apartment to check on her and i saw a man on the deck so pushed him off but i didnt know it was my brother. he caught onto the railing so i smashed his fingers with a sledge hammer and he fell 200 ft. Sadly he landed on a bush and survived and so i took the refridguator and through it on him but right after i did i had a heart atack" Then god lets him in to heaven. Then he has the next person come up and god asks him the same question. the man replies, " i was at my brotheres house when some crazy guy pushes me off the my brothers deck but luckily my fingers get caught onthe railing, Then the crazy guy takes a hammer and hits my fingers and i fall but land on a bush. Then the man throughs a refridguator and i get killed." God chuckles and lets him into heaven. The next person comes up and says," picture this, naked in a refridguator." excpaination: the man in tthe refriduator was cheating with the 1st mans wife.

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Why is my car broken? Because I drove it into a wall.

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Q: What's better than ice cream? A: Two ice creams! Q: What's better than 2 ice creams? A: Still two ice creams!

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Once upon a time.

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The WNBA.

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why did the chicken cross the road? To prove to the possum it can be done.

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What if Chuck Norris got shot by a bullet? The most interesting man in the world would save him.

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Why was 9 afraid of 1? Because when dialed together, an emergency call was most likely coming and 9 is very sensitive to those types of moments

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What's worse than 100 babies tied to a tree. 1 baby tied to 100 trees

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You know what happens when you assume? You base a conclusion on insufficient information.

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Why can't helen keller skii? Because she's dead

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Why did the baby cross the road? His parents were drug addicts, and didn't pay him any attention.

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Why was Jim gay? Because he liked penis.

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse and progressive world in which we live.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? I can't stick my dick in a watermelon.

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How do you tell if a politician is lying? You make him take a polygraph test.

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What's the difference between a porsche and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a porsche in my garage.

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Why was Martin Luther King assassinated? Because he had a mustache.

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how does a zookeeper build a snowman. same as everyone else

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Boy: Doctor! Doctor! I can't see my arm! Doctor: It's because your blind son

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops