Why did a monkey fall out of a tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of a tree? Gravity. Why did the third monkey fall out of a tree? He was stapled to the second monkey.

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Your feet are so big your gonna need bigger shoes.

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Little Timmy walked up to the teacher and asked her "Can i go to the restroom?" The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you ?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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Jingle bells, batman smells, robin laid an egg.

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Why did Billy fall down? Because his brain was replaced with a piece of toast.

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank

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What did the white man hand to the mexican? His college degree because the mexican had completed all four years of college with a 4.0 GPA.

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A white man bumps into an Asian man while walking down the street. They have a brief chat. As they part ways, the white man says, "Facebook me!" The Asian man replies, "Due to my socio-economic situation I cannot currently afford an Internet service." So they exchange telephone numbers.

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What do you get a black guy when he is hungry? Something edible.

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Why did the kid cross the road? He was strapped to a chicken!

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How many beans are in a soup? Who cares i'm starving, Lets Eat!!!

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How do I recover from my Pokémon addiction? Catch 'em All!

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whats worse then finding a finger in your soup? - being a cook and losing a finger

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What happened to the black man when his alarm went off? He got up and took a shower. Then he got dressed and went to church because it was Sunday.

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What's red and smells like cherries? Cherries

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why did the chicken cross the road? why do you care?

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How did the people get into the pyramid?? They didn't

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding a apple in your worm.

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What do you call a Mexican with a Green Card? A hard working American Citizen

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What wears a white robe and shines? A special boar.

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Two people were walking down the street. One was assaulted.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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Your momma is so boss that I work for her.

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I scream. You scream. We all scream.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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