Homosexual babies? It's a choice

Why was johny late to school? He died

What did Santa get for a young boy? A gun. What did Santa get for the young boys sister? Nothing, the boy shot Santa. Who sent out presents the next Christmas? Not Santa.

yo mama is so fat, she should seriously consider gastric bypass surgery, morbid obesity is extremely detrimental to one's health

So two muffins are in an oven. They get baked.

Yo mommas so stupid, she got raped.

How do you get a baby to stop crying You kill it

How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it. How do you make it stop crying? You throw another brick at it.

Roses are brown. Violets are brown. It's the middle of winter. Flowers look like poop.

Wha'ts Slippery when wet? A Wet Slipper.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Why did the white guy feel awkward at the black people convention? He didn't know anyone there

What did Santa Claus say to the young boy on Christmas Day? Santa Claus is a myth, that was actually a pedophile.

What's the difference between peanut butter and jam? Peanut butter is a food paste made primarily from dry roasted peanuts, while jam is a product made with whole fruit, that is cut into pieces or crushed.

How many Alzheimer patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side!

Why doesn't Santa come in the Summer? Because it's not Christmas.

dead babies

Q: Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? A: Because she is a woman.

Whoa! A talking carrot!

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm.

What is as ugly as Justin Bieber's face? Justin Bieber's face.

A man walks in a bar. He walks out.

What do you call a deaf person whom is behind the wheel of a car about to run off a cliff? ....

why did the 1st koala fall out of the tree ? it was dead why did the 2nd koala fall out of the tree ? it was hit by the first koala why did the 3rd koala fall out of the tree ? it thought it was a game why did the 4th koala fall out of the tree ? it was hit by a fridge why did the 5th koala fall out of the tree ? it was inside the fridge

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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