Q. what has 2 legs and can't walk A. a paraplegic

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Q.What does chuck norris eat as breakfast? ans.FOOD

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Dan O'Driscoll

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Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To hold their pants up.

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French people

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You know what happens when you assume? You base a conclusion on insufficient information.

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Q: My mom's getting really old and It's starting to get hard to shop for her. Any ideas? A: You should get her a coffin.

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Why are girls large and round? Because they are raised by wild packs of oompa loompas.

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What Mary short for? Due to the fact she has no legs, on account of the flesh eating she contracted after a visit to argentina thanks to the make-a-wish foundation. Mary also has cancer

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Why did Susie fall off a swing? She had an inner ear infection.

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Your moms so fat, she's not skinny

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What do you cal a black boy with a bike? A thief

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How do you escape a vicious tiger? You cleverly create a distraction so the tiger's focus is not on you. Then, you quickly run away because the tiger doesn't know you are leaving.

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Did you hear about that one time (@ band camp lol) where there was a little boy and he wanted to go swimming sooooo abd and then ooo look squirrel

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the your face joke

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If one train goes east at 30mph and another train goes south at 53mph, how many pancakes does it take to make a mattress? 7 because peanut butter can't climb trees.

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why was the man coughing? because there was a knife in his throat.

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Fuck yourself you piece of shit.

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Whats worse than being a Jew? Being black.

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Question : Why did the boy need to change his pants? Answer: During recess, the little boy was running to fast and fell on the ground. Then kid he has been bullying pissed on his leg.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Onions stink. And so do you.

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What did the husband tell his obese wife? I love you honey

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Why did Helen Kellers dog run away? You would too if your name was Hjshdvcyehbretafvvba.

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Why do black people eat so much fried chicken? Because it's delicious!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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