What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

Why did the small child fall off a cliff? Because it was stupid

Why was the woman convicted or arson? She set her house on fire. Why did she set her house on fire? Her husband was beating her.

An elderly lady walks into an elevator. She falls over and I kick her in the head.

a little girl gets raped

What begins with "f" and ends with "uck"? A curse word.

What do you call a black guy flying a plane. A pilot

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Just kidding, Stephen Hawking doesn't drink.

Why did the man eat the apple? Because he was hungry.

2 gingers went to a pumpkin patch... And nobody ever found them( life lesson, don't take your ginger to a pumpkin patch)

like my drawing of a white person?

What's faster than a Mexican running away with your T.V.? An Airplane

Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second elephant fall out of the tree? Because it was attached to the first elephant. Why did the third elephant fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

A man with a ski mask on enters a bank, he just came back from the slopes.

An Irishman walks into a bar. He quickly exits as he thought it was the Polish restaurant located directly nextdoor. He then enters the Polish restaurant and orders a delicious lunch. He tips his waiter 20%.

What did one guy say to the other guy?? Well he just hi but hi backwards is ih and that reminded him of his days in Nahm because that's what his Sargent said and that reminded him of ice-cream because his Sargent smelled like ice-cream and that reminded him of the song that the ice-cream played which reminded him of Disney world which reminded him of a priest raping little boys which mad him laugh because that reminded him of a Jew picking up a penny which reminded him of Osama be shot in the f**k**g face and that reminded him to say how are you to the other guy.

A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

What do you call a hickey on your shoulder? Bad aim -Cooper Simpson

What's the difference between Jews and boy scouts? Boy scouts come back from camp.

What is the diffrence between a guy and pie? The pie taste like fruit somethimes

what is red and looks like blue paint? red paint.

What is 69? A two digit number.

What do you call a muslim behind the controls of an airliner? A pilot you rascist.

i want to eat a horse out jaffa cake

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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