What did the say to the host of the pool party after he pooped? Mr. TImmons! There is chocolate in the pool!

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I used to be a schizophrenic but we're okay now

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Friends are like trees, they fall down when hit multiple times with an axe.

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who hooked up with Sinead Walker? • Liam Findlay

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why is 6 afraid of 7?? because 7 8 9

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A mexican goes to an ATM.

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Q. what has 2 legs and can't walk A. a paraplegic

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A moth walks into a podiatrist's office, the podiatrist rubs his eyes and looks again and realizes it was just a man taking off his coat in a grandeur fashion.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither has he.

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Your mom is so poor, she contributes to the high unemployment of the country and didn't even have enough money to feed her family so Social Services came in and took them away

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A man runs into a psychiatrist's office and screams, "You gotta help me doc! I just killed seven people in my office building!"

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Lol you are really adorable, is more like maybe we will ask you some time, but hey, if you are asking, I mean you are beautiful, insecure, easy to break... I am totally joking by the way, you are completely down to earth, you are sweet, you know what you want, etc etc, hey, and to know what you want in life you got to be confident. Wait a second... I "act" like a savage? Lawl, "streams of OceANUS catchphrase"

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A man saw a dinosaur. He probably watched it on the television because dinosaurs have been extingt for a very long time.

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A man walks into a bar. Realizing that he left his keys in his car, he called a locksmith to unlock the doors. He did not have money to pay this locksmith and was put in prison for his large sums of debt. He was shanked by a fellow inmate and died a few days later in the prison's hospital ward.

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Hello

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What did the penny say to the other penny? Nothing, because pennies can't talk.

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How much is an abortion? A life

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How did the dog die? It was wet because of the rain so the little boy put him in the microwave for 30 minutes to warm him up

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Why is the child screaming? Because he just woke up from a bad dream.

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Q. Why was the cat brown? A. because it was a maori

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A Ferrari Enzo and a Toyota Prius were having a street race. The Driver of the Ferrari died after he was hit by a bus.

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What's the difference of a team of black people and a pile of shit? None. Kelvin Yang.

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Sarah Palin is President

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What's the difference between a lamborghini and a sackful of dead babies? one is a car and the other is a grotesque travesty.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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