Q: what would george washington be doing if he were alive right now? A: screaming in his grave

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Why did the woman make a sandwich? She was hungry

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A woman gets in her car to drive.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why did we start questioning the philosophical reasoning of chickens?

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and and no legs in front of a door? A: A quadruple amputee.

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A man walks into a bar.

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What would you do if you're eyes just suddently exploded? You would never see again.

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What's red and smells like cherries? Cherries

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Whats worse than a dead dog? 5 dead babies and a dead dog...

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How many beans are in a soup? Who cares i'm starving, Lets Eat!!!

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lewis bedford

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A game of one-on-one basketball in a common physical education class in present day mexico city.

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What's a mexican's favorite sport? It varies from person to person.

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a rabbi sees a nazi in time square. he simply walks past because as we are in america the nazi can do nothing to harm him.

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Sam: Knock knock? You: Who's there? Sam: Sammy Sosa. You: Hi, Sammy Sosa. Sam: Hi.

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Someone once told me a joke. It was funny.

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A hot girl walks past a boy and the boy turns around and watches her pass. The girl sees the boy staring and asks with a slight attitude, "What are you looking at?", to which the boy replied, "Well, I noticed you walking towards me and I couldn't help but think 'Hmm..she looks familiar. Have I seen her at school? No. Work? No. Somewhere else? Perhaps.' I then concluded that I've never seen you before and then you turned around and asked me what I was looking at. What are YOU looking at?"

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What happened to the black man when his alarm went off? He got up and took a shower. Then he got dressed and went to church because it was Sunday.

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What do you get when you combine High Fructose corn syrup. sunflower oil, carbohydrates, and water. How the heck should I know!

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I don't get it

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You play the piano? What more can you do? Sounds complicated but try me.

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What do you call a file named pedo? A. Pedobear B. Toast C. Pedofile

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Q: Whats worse than having a dead car battery? A: Going to prison and getting raped by a black guy

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shut up

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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