An octopus walks into a bar. The people in the bar, realizing the potential of danger, stand up and leave the bar quietly.

What did the boy with cancer get for christmas? -A haircut

Like this joke

How can you tell you're in a childrens' ambulance from the inside? From the clown patterned body bags.

what did the joke say to the anti-joke? do you want to fight

What's worse than throwing 8 babies off a cliff? Throwing 1 baby off a cliff.

Communism

Your Mom

How do you make a blond cry? Rape her

Hollywood presents: "HELP US MARIO! THE WORLD IS BEING OVERWHELMED BY KOOPA AND HIS FORCES OF TURTLES!" "What the hell do you want me to do? I am a damn plumber, squish them? Besides they are just turtles" "Oh yeah..." Steven Spielberg: Get bay on this script, at least its much better than the first one.

What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They are obviously different species but they both have wings and are birds and are actually pretty similar. Geese are usually bigger though I guess.

Two friends not to far apart: A: Hey you, you hear me?! B: yes. A: You hear me?! B: yes!! A: You hear me?! B: yes, yes, what!?! A: You hear me?! B: YEEEEEEEES WHAT'S going on?!?! (gets upset) A: Nothing, I'm just checking your hearing.

How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? over 100

A man is walking alone in a park and stumbles upon a lamp. He rubs the lamp and a genie appears out of thin air. The genie tells him he has three wishes to wish for whatever his heart desires. The man naturally wishes for Anthony Davis to shave his damn unibrow. He then throws the lamp at a little boys face and laughs uncontrollably.

Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear, fuzzy wuzzy had no hair, fuzzy wuzzy had cancerand died

Whats worse than getting in a 30 MPH car accident? Getting in a 40 MPH car accident.

Roses are red, Violets are red, The grass is red, The garden is on fire.

what do you do when you see a 40 ft tall gorilla? WHO CARES, RUN!

What do you call cheese thats not yours? Somebody elses cheese

Billy: Mom.... Dad, I have decided that I want to live on my own. Parents: Great son! We're so proud of you! Billy: Thanks for your support! Your luggage is outside by the taxi.

I told my friend a joke. He didn't laugh, I asked why. He said he was autistic and he does not understand humor.

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What is worse worse than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

What did the frog say to the beautiful sleeping princess? Ribbit

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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