How many pumpkins can you fit in a watch? Depends how much jelly is in the pumpkins

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what does the doctor say to the patient. you have cancer

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Going for the Dislike record woot I farted!

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Robin, get in the car.

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a boy walks in a house and mother says hi who are you and the boy says does it really matter whad really maters is wht you will do about your dead son

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Why aren't jokes funny in base 8? Because 7, 10, 11.

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What is the difference between my elbow and my penis? I Cant lick my elbow

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Who are you?

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WNBA

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Your mama's so fat her patronus is a cake

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How do you make a dog drink? You put the dog in a blender

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Why was Lucile crying? Because she was sad.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut

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What did the anti-joke say? Nothing for it is an anti-joke which is a group of word formed to create a sentence and sentences cannot speak.

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a fat man eats porkchops all day ling shit a just craped my pants

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why did the baby cross the road...? cause he was chained to my bumper

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Fuck her

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A horse walks into a bar, Bartender says why the long face? and the horse says, i have horse aids

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What does a girl with no arms on a swing? Falls.

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Has anyone told you, you look fat today?" "Because you don't.

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A man yells at the top of the Grand Canyon, "Heyoooooo" He hears His voice echo multiple times. He yells again, "Heyoooooo" This time he hears his echo and a girl yell "heyo" back to him from within the canyon. He looks down. He falls. A mountain goat breaks his fall. The man is so thankful for the goat. He says, " Thank you goat! You saved my life!" The goat then pulls out a gun, and shoots him thrice. The man dies.

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balls in ya mouf

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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