Why was John sad? His parents were murdered.

What did the man do at the "take a penny leave a penny holder" He took a penny, and left a penny.

Why didn't the boy enjoy his lunch? It was dinner time.

you mother is so stupid that it takes her quite a while to understand jokes

What did the cancer patient say to the arab? the tumors hurt my body

How did Peter Parker tell his uncle that he was Spiderman? He didn't because he was already dead.

nice shorts.

A guy walks into a bar and asks a nice looking girl if he can buy her a drink. She promptly rejects the offer.

whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff.

Two muffins were in an oven. Neither of them said anything because they are inanimate objects. After they were finished baking, they were pulled out and set to cool on a counter to be eaten at a later time.

The chicken came before the egg. Because eggs are an unborn chicken, and it is impossible for an unborn chicken to ejaculate.

Q: Whatcha doin?? A:Ur mom. . .

2 blonds are driving on the road on their way to Disney Land. They come to the sign that says Disney Land left so they started crying, turned around and went home.

Why did the black guy hate the white guy??? Because the white guy enslaved his ancestors.

Why did the thief steal the kitchen sink? Everything else was stolen by another thief earlier in the day.

how did the dinosaurs die? they got old

What do you say to a black man who is in your house at night-time, carrying your television? Sir, may you please put down the television as it belongs to me and I worked hard to earn the money to buy it. If you do not I will have to contact the authorities to deal with you in a correct and fair manner.

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW

Knock, Knock! Who's there? Matt. Matt, who? You're friend Matt that you texted twenty minutes ago telling me to come over.

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Your landlord, clear out your stuff by tuesday"

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

What happens when you eat too many breadsticks? You get constipated.

I avhe dyiaexls.

flip flop chop, clip clop cow, POW. hahahahahah. :).

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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