Whats red and hairy ? A carpet !

How do you kill a blue elephant? How? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? How? You hold it's nose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a orange elephant? How? You can't, they don't exist. How do you kill a white elephant? How? You tickle it till it turns pink, then you hold it's noose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

Why doesn't stevie wonder play snooker? Because it's not very popular in the US.

What is the best thing about having sex with twenty-seven year old's? There's twenty of them

Knock knock. Who's there? Me. ME?!

Did you hear that Hellen Keller went driving? Now she's also paralyzed.

I love Ciara!

Roses are red, Violets are blueish, Without Hitler, We'd all be Jewish.

Why did the boy fall in the hole? He had no eyes

Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. "Where's my tractor?"

Why did the cow go moo, because its a cow

What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper with some red stuff on it.

why did the fox jump over the pen ? it was tuesday

A welsh guy walks into a pub. This something any average guy would do.

A bar walks into a bar, it is then you realize you are in an alternate dimension.

A blonde's house is on fire so she calls the fire department and they ask her how to get there. She gives them the address, but they hear her wrong and she dies a horrible fiery death.

A cat fell out of a really tall tree. It didn't land on its feet.

When was Timothy born? He wasn't.

1,2 Freddy's Coming For You 3'4 Better Lock Your Doors 5'6 Grab Your Crucifix 7'8 Stay Up Late 9'10 Never Sleep Again Bonus 11'12 He's Gonna See You In Hell

Why did the woman drop her baby? she had a stroke.

What is worse than being ran over by a bus? Nothing really.

Why was poor justin killed His mother kicked him into a pool of blood-thirsty aligators.

A dyslexic pimp buys a warehouse.

3 men walk into a bar. The fourth one ducks.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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