your moms so fat she has a heart attack when she walks to the pantry.

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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Whats the worst thing that happened in the holocaust? it ended

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A black man, a hispanic man, and an asian man all walk into a biker bar. The bartender asks them if they know that this is a biker bar. All three say yes and tell the bartender that they are in the same motorcycle club. The bartender serves them a beer.

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what's your favorite soccer team? liverpool

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When my Xbox died, my girlfriend said: "Finally, you can treat me the same way you treated that thing!" So I tapped her so hard that she died

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What do you call a pickle with a cape? A pickle with a cape

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What do clowns put on bagels? Cream Cheese

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Which one is hardest?

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms or legs. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

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What do you call a midget sitting in a tree? Jim, because that's his name.

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Why was the baseball player arrested after stealing a base? Because he pulled out a knife and stabbed the shortstop in the chest.

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What's your name? You tell me.

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Why couldn't Maria play Softball? She was born without legs.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Dying of terminal cancer.

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Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: It varies largely by hipster, the same way it does with any other person.

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Why did the women keep scratching her head? Because she had lice

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Why did the dog run away from home? His house burned down and his owners were killed.

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What did the cancer patient say to the arab? the tumors hurt my body

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Your landlord, clear out your stuff by tuesday"

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Three tomatoes are walking down the street... No wait, they're in my salad.

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How many pumpkins can you fit in a watch? Depends how much jelly is in the pumpkins

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What did Helen Keller say when she fell out of a tree? SHFVDHGCIJCBSHG

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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