Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black Because I'm blind

Knock knock Come in!

how do you make coffee you put it in a mug

Time flies like a banana.

sweaty black guy

-Knock, Knock -Who's there? -Granny -You don't sound like Granny... -Just let me in little boy. -MOM!!!!!

What's white and sticky? Glue

why did the 14 year old girl cross the road? to get an abortion of the child she became impregnated with after getting raped.

Hollywood presents: "HELP US MARIO! THE WORLD IS BEING OVERWHELMED BY KOOPA AND HIS FORCES OF TURTLES!" "What the hell do you want me to do? I am a damn plumber, squish them? Besides they are just turtles" "Oh yeah..." Steven Spielberg: Get bay on this script, at least its much better than the first one.

Why did the bunny eat his food

everyone's always talking about the emperor's clothes, don't they know this is murica

What's worse than a woman driver? Getting a cactus shoved up your ass.

*ring ring ring* hello? This is a robbery... Dum dum dum.... (hangs up) *beep beep beep*

Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

Why can't Jesus eat M&M's? Because they keep falling through the holes in his hands.

Knock Knock Who's there (five gunshots)

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Cheese on toast.

Q: What did the bulbasoar say to the charmander? A: bulbasoarrr

knock, knock whos there? steve steve who? steve johnson hi steve

What is brown and smells? Poop

What's red and green? A frog in a blender

Why isn't Neil Patrick Harris like Barney Stinson in real life? Because he's gay

How did the chicken cross the road? He went to the crosswalk so all the cars had to stop for him.

Your momma is so boss that I work for her.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...