A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

WNBA

Fuck her

Why was Lucile crying? Because she was sad.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

2 gingers went to a pumpkin patch... And nobody ever found them( life lesson, don't take your ginger to a pumpkin patch)

what did Johnny get for Halloween. ebola

Why couldnt the black man drink from the water fountain? Because the water fountain was broken.

Knock knock It's open, come in.

How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? Fish

A plane crashed in the rainforest. The survivors all buried themselves because no survival equipment were left and they all sought to kill themselves in their deep state of shock and fear.

Okay so two penquins are sitting in a bathtub when one asks the other "Hey pass the soap!". The other one jokingly replies "what do I look like a typewriter?"

what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

How do you kill one Jew. A gun. How do you kill a thousand Jews. With a millon angery germans.

What happened when a black man's phone went off? He answered it.

whats worse the being in a car crash? finding out that your mother and father were in the other car and were fatally injured.

I LIKE TURLES.

What lives underground? Grandpa

What's black, white, and red all over? A zebra that's just been shot, despite the fact that zebra hunting is illegal.

Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black Because I'm blind

Knock knock Come in!

how do you make coffee you put it in a mug

sweaty black guy

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...