A man is walking on a beach when he finds a golden lamp. He rubs it and a genie comes out. The genie tells the man he will grant three wishes. The man wastes his wishes on material goods that do not bring him happiness.

What do you call a black Arnold Schwarzenegger? Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Why didn't the man show up for work on Monday? He gets Mondays off.

Life is like a box of chocolates. You eat them. get fat. Die.

What type of food was the black guy eating? fruit, he is on a diet

What s faster than a black guy with a TV? His brother with a VCR.

A priest, a rabbi, and an atheist walk into a bar. They sit down and have a calm discussion about the differences in their beliefs.

Your mom is so fat, her pants are starting to get tight.

What do you call a black guy in space? An astronaut

what do you call a black guy in a cop car a cop

You're momma's so fat, that I just wanna go over there and make hot passionate love to her. What? I'm a chubby chaser.

How do you get a movie star to go out with you? Blackmail.

a boy walked into a pet store to get his bird some food. they were all out. the bird died.

Two muffins are in an oven. Although they both possess the extraordinary ability to speak, strangely each remains silent, apparently lost in their own thoughts. Thus nobody has any reason to think they are any different than any other muffins. Later after they've been baked and allowed to cool, they are sold to a woman who eats them along with a small salad. She enjoys their chewy, hearty texture, and lightly sweet taste. She is completely unaware of what amazing discovery has just been lost to science.

Why didn't the boy enjoy his lunch? It was dinner time.

Noah is Smart.

guess what Beethoven is doing right now. de-composing

Your argument is invalid, but I will allow you your opinion nonetheless.

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? Neither have i

Why did the chicken cross the road? His motives so far are unknown as he is a chicken, and therefor cannot divulge the information.

look left now look right. washing machine

Roses are brown. Violets are brown. It's the middle of winter. Flowers look like poop.

An Irishman walks into a bar. He quickly exits as he thought it was the Polish restaurant located directly nextdoor. He then enters the Polish restaurant and orders a delicious lunch. He tips his waiter 20%.

What is funny about 9/11. Nothing, it was a tragic day for the world.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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