Why is Chuck Norris' beard so great? because he grooms it daily.

Whats the difference between a duck? One of its legs are both the same.

Knock knock Come in!

Two Penn State administrators walk into a butt.

Morgan Freeman walks into a bar. Everyone is pleasantly surprised they are in the presence of a celebrity.

Nickelback.

why did the little old lady die? she was mugged then shot in the head 5 times.

What's worse than a woman driver? Getting a cactus shoved up your ass.

i like my women how i like my coffee ....i dont like coffee

why is 5 afraid of 6? it isnt

What do you call a black man who flies planes? A pilot, what do you call him you freaking racist!?!?!?!?!?

Knock, knock. Who's there? It's Bob. Oh hi, Bob, come on in.

how do you call a boomerang that does not come back? - a stick

Knock knock! Who's there? Dick! Dick who? Dick Stewart, your neighbor from next door!

why was the asian kid found dead? he failed an examen

Why did the boy commit suicide? Because he was bullied at school and felt it was the right decision.

A woman refuses to make a sandwich and walks away unharmed.

A man. That is all.

How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends on gender and environment, but a fully grown, adult, male polar bear weighs from 800 to 1600 pounds.

What's funnier than a midget bungie jumping? Nothing

What do u call a black guy that sell drugs? A nigger

What do Laura Bush and 9/11 have in common? George Bush did them.

"did you hear about the midget's self-murder?" "No, what happend?" "He jumped off the curb"

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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