Q:A man has 100 chocolate bars he eats 93 of them. What has he got now? A:Diabetes

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What did the bartender say to the midget as he entered the bar? Nothing besides attempting to serve him in the same manner as any other reveller whilst attempting to disguise his sense of pity for the midget's debilitating and somewhat stigmatised condition.

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I ENJOY MASTURBATING

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He farted

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lewis bedford

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What did the terrorist have for breakfast? Scrambled eggs and a glass of orange juice.

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Why did James come back to drive the boat again this year? Because he likes driving boats and towing passengers

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why did the 40 year old man quickly close his web page when his wife called his name? Because he had to leave.

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What's worse than Bin Weevils? Nick Clegg.

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Whats worse than a dead dog? 5 dead babies and a dead dog...

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What is black and hangs from a tree in my backyard? My neighbors children.

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If you are going down the road in your boat and the pedal falls off how many cheese burgers can you eat 21 because a motorcycle doesnt have doors.

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Doctor: “Knock Knock” Patient: “Who's there?” Doctor: “The interrupting Doctor” Patient: “The inter- Doctor: You have cancer.

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Yo mama is so fat, that she recieves an allowance due to being physically disabled.

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Why did the boy cross the road? Because he was on his way to a friends house, after being kicked out yet again because his parents are homophobes and can't come to terms with his sexual preferences. When he got there, his friend was already asleep and he had to sleep in the gutter. He then got a cold and died because his immune system had been weakened by aids. His parents still didn't accept him, and didn't go to his funeral.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. why did the frog fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the monkey,

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Q.Why was 6 crying? A.Because 7,8,9

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What's worse than listening to a teacher talk? This joke.

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What is samios' favorite position? ;) Full back... In the bum.

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What do you call a pelican with no wings? A dead pelican

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how do you know that harry potter isnt real a ginger has two freinds

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How do women learn to drive? Drivers ED.

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Hey, I just met you And this is crazy, but you're getting too close And I'm about to file a restraining order, so back up, maybe?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops