look left now look right. washing machine

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I'm so hungry, I could eat an adequately sized meal

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How many ears does Captain Kirk have? Two.

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

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women's lacrosse.

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Why was the black man screaming? The KKK was coming to lynch him.

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Why couldn't the blonde divide 5 by 0? Because it's impossible to divide by 0.

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Why did the man eat the apple? Because he was hungry.

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Three vampires were at a bar 1 & 2 were drinking and asked the 3rd why he wasn't. He replied, I'm full I found a used tampon on my way here.

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Why did the old man die? Because everyone dies

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Okay so two penquins are sitting in a bathtub when one asks the other "Hey pass the soap!". The other one jokingly replies "what do I look like a typewriter?"

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What is 18 inches long and makes a woman scream all night? Crib death.

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Wanna hear a joke? Toyota

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing

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whats worse than a worm in a rotten apple? 2 worms in a rotten apple. whats worse than 2 worms in a rotten apple? 3 worms in a rotten apple. whats worse than 3 worms in a rotten apple? the haulocaust. whats worse than the haulocaust? 4 worms in a rotten apple. wait wait...that was rascist,nevermind this joke.

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What did the anti-joke say? Nothing for it is an anti-joke which is a group of word formed to create a sentence and sentences cannot speak.

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once three middle easterns were walking down the street bomb bomb bomb

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What's worst than Rick Perry? Two Rick Perrys.

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What did Jimmy get for his birthday? Nothing, he was dead

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What is the best thing since sliced bread? Sliced butter.

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abcdHIV this disease is killing me

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Why so serious? Why bad grammar?

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What did the aids patient do after he was diagnosed? He had sex with many more people and gave them aids as well.

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No, I don't have ADH...- Oh look, a butterfly!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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