What did a man say to the woman with two black eyes? nothing he ain't already told her twice....

What do you tell a 500 lb. Sumo wrestler who's eating your food? Stop eating my food.

What did the blind, deaf, mute child get for Christmas? Leukemia

High school gym class.

Why did the bugger cross the rode? He was tired of getting picked on

old mcdonald had a farm had..... he now lives in the city

You know how geese fly in a V formation and sometimes one side is longer than the other. Do you know why that is? Because there are more geese on that side.

roses are grey violets are grey everything is? grey i'm colour blind fml

what's the difference between a pile of shit and a human. a human has a mind, a pile of shit doesn't

What did the homeless child get for Christmas? Jumped.

You cannot invite, hire people for money and expect loyalty Red, you need to make them earn the right to work for you, merits, background checks, consistency, friend, I can help you with a lot of my own experience, what saddens me about you being the leader, is that you have a good heart. And you are naive, a dangerous combination, if anyone such as Jonas shows up again, your life may be in danger, I mean you know who I am talking about.

What would happen if you threw 50 plates off of your roof? Nothing. No one in their right mind would do that. Besides, who owns 50 plates?

is it big enough to have sex in????

no one walks in to a bar bar tender: shit!

Yo mama's so fat, we are all extremely concerned for her health.

What's a bug's favorite sport? Bug's can't play sports.

what did the Mexican fire fighter name his two kids? Jose and Josbe

How do you get a clown out of a tree? Shoot him in the head.

What do you call something with no legs or arms swimming in the lake? A fish.

Why was the alpaca sad He just got raped

what goes plop, plop, fizz, fizz? baby twins in an acid bath.

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

How come the mexican couldnt support his family? Wendy's stopped hiring a week ago

if rooster puts egg on roof, in what direction it will roll? There was no egg

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...