What did the fat man buy at Mcdonalds? A salad, hes on a diet

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What do you call a duck with a mustache? A duck with a mustache.

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what do you do if you wake up at midnight and your tv is floating? -call the police because you caught a burgler in the act of stealing your tv

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What did one muffin say to the other? I don't know, but you need a psychiatrist.

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A black man, a hispanic man, and an asian man all walk into a biker bar. The bartender asks them if they know that this is a biker bar. All three say yes and tell the bartender that they are in the same motorcycle club. The bartender serves them a beer.

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a black man and a mexican are sitting in the back seat of a car....whose driving? the cop

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LOL i just pissed on Hitlers grave! Shoudn't killed the Jews BITCH!

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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I slept with a girl with aids and now I do and so does everybody else I have sex with

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1+1=3 If you don't use a condom.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ben. Ben who? Ben Dover.

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Waseem likes to talk with his mouth full.

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ur mother

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Q .What robin told to batman before they got into the car? A. Get into the car!!

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I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus, the divorce papers were filed soon thereafter.

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Knock Knock Who's There? No One You're Crazy

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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There is a car full of black people.

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The WNBA.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, go ask the chicken.

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two philosophers stood in silence at the foot of a very large mountain; a mountain not only too high to climb, but also too wide to walk around. So the first philosopher finally speaks: "...so, what do you do for a living?"

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Which one is hardest?

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A man is walking on a beach when he finds a golden lamp. He rubs it and a genie comes out. The genie tells the man he will grant three wishes. The man wastes his wishes on material goods that do not bring him happiness.

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A blonde walks into a store and asks for the microwave behind the counter. The man behind the register promptly hands her the microwave and charges her $435 for it, which is utterly ridiculous.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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