Listen I know you're a cat and I'm a cat but I know we can be friends

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i wish i was a tree !

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SAD STORY: Boy: Make me a sandwich. Girl: No.

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People Eating Tasty Animals

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What do you call a fly with no wings? A walk.

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What's the most wonderful time of the year? When your wife dies.

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Situation: A bear is cutting a sunflower's hair Question: How many kangaroos does it take to do surgery on a meatball? Answer: Tomato. Because zebras eat twelve kiwis in a factory every February 29th.

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SNICHOLS AND DOOLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Chuck Norris

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whats the differance between a orange and a dead baby one is a delicious treat the other is a fruit

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What is brown and sticky? A masturbating Negro.

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Roses are red Vilots are blue God made people pretty What the happend to you

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milly, milly, milly, cat

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haiku's are stupid, and do not always make sense, refrigerator.

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Roses are green Violets are green I'm colour blind Everything is green

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A owl into a bar This joke is a hoot

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how do you get a emo kid out of a tree? cut him down get it: because he was depressed and so poor that he couldn't afford a hair cut or new clothes. he also had single mother whose boyfriend sexually abused him so he was confused about his sexuality. Then people just called him "emo" and said he was acting out so they ignored him and he never gave him help when he asked for it because they said he just wanted attention so he killed himself

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whats worse than biting into an apple with a worm in it? being raped by justin beiber

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When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.

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Q: Why did the paraplegic go to the gym? A: to watch his friend work out

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What do you get when you mix red and yellow? Orange.

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What's the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? Lots of stuff.

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Hey, I want to because you are really sweet and deserve it, and damn you are hot, but thats secondary in your case, in every case actually, otherwise I would just be doing it with meat whose soul and thoughts I hate/dislike/detest/etc, and that is not who I am. Once huh? I mean I said night/day/shower/breakfast table... Not so sure I can last for that long with a girl as hot and sweet as you for that long. Kidding, hey, best friend huh? Wow, I mean that`s really sweet, and you are really a special friend to me, but uh, to be honest, best friend? I barely know you... I hate this part of myself, I am blunt with that honesty thing, I may just have insulted you, but you know, I also need to be able to live with myself If I am going to enjoy life.

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Once upon a time there was a prince and a princess. They married as was the social custom of the time, and produced a series of children whose purpose was to sustain the royal bloodline for many years to come. AF

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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