What did the mute guy say to the deaf guy? *awkward silence* What did the deaf guy say to the mute guy? *Awkward silence....huh?*

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Q:A man has 100 chocolate bars he eats 93 of them. What has he got now? A:Diabetes

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A: Ask me if im a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

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what does the doctor say to the patient. you have cancer

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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If you can dodge a traffic, that probably has little or no relation to how well you can dodge a ball.

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What is as ugly as Justin Bieber's face? Justin Bieber's face.

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Why did Tommy cry? His tear glands emptied out of his eyes

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What lives underground? Grandpa

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Why was the monkey sad? Because somebody stole his banana. Why was the monkey happy? Because your parents are dead.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A zebra that's just been shot, despite the fact that zebra hunting is illegal.

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what kind of person screaws in a light blub........ a electrician

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What do you call five white guys sitting on a bench? THe NBA

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Can I touch it?

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Why do black people love watermelon? It's simply delicious.

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Jingle bells, batman smells, robin laid an egg.

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Why do you never hit a black man with your car? Because that's vehicular homicide.

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When life gives you lemons you leave the earth in search of what strange lifeform sent you them.

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Black people

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A man walks into a bar.

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Why would anyone try to run from a fight if:Its not the size of the dog in the fight, its the size of the fight in the dog? I wasn't even talking about dogs and fight isn't something in you! Next time, don't listen to your football coach.

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Q: I am an over-protective father looking for my son who was kidnapped and am suddenly traveling with a mentally retarded woman who cant remember her name. By the way my wife was murdered and my son has physical disorder. Then, im hooked up with a hippy who doesnt care about anything. Who am I? A: Marlin the clownfish (from Finding Nemo).

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Q.Why was 6 crying? A.Because 7,8,9

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IF circles are squares and squares are purple and i dont know what im talking about does that make all potatoes orange?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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