Guy 1: there is this really funny knock knock joke. Ok you start. Guy 2: knock knock Guy 1: who's there Guy 2: umm what? I don't know

how much dub would a dubstep step if a dubstep could step dub? purple

Why do cows have tails? Because my pet rock stopped breathing.

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

what does the doctor say to the patient. you have cancer

A: Ask me if im a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

What did the mute guy say to the deaf guy? *awkward silence* What did the deaf guy say to the mute guy? *Awkward silence....huh?*

Q:A man has 100 chocolate bars he eats 93 of them. What has he got now? A:Diabetes

If you can dodge a traffic, that probably has little or no relation to how well you can dodge a ball.

What lives underground? Grandpa

What is as ugly as Justin Bieber's face? Justin Bieber's face.

Why did Tommy cry? His tear glands emptied out of his eyes

What's black, white, and red all over? A zebra that's just been shot, despite the fact that zebra hunting is illegal.

what kind of person screaws in a light blub........ a electrician

Why was the monkey sad? Because somebody stole his banana. Why was the monkey happy? Because your parents are dead.

Why would anyone try to run from a fight if:Its not the size of the dog in the fight, its the size of the fight in the dog? I wasn't even talking about dogs and fight isn't something in you! Next time, don't listen to your football coach.

Can I touch it?

Jingle bells, batman smells, robin laid an egg.

Why do black people love watermelon? It's simply delicious.

Why do you never hit a black man with your car? Because that's vehicular homicide.

What do you call five white guys sitting on a bench? THe NBA

When life gives you lemons you leave the earth in search of what strange lifeform sent you them.

A man walks into a bar.

Black people

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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