Of two wrongs don't make a right what do they make? I don't know but three rights make a left

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Why doesn't Santa come in the Summer? Because it's not Christmas.

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how do you keep a blond in sespence you dont tell her

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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dead babies

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What's funny about suicide? Nothing, that's horrible.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police, your wife just died

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no u

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why do black people hate aspirin? Its white, it works, and you have to pick cotton to get to it.

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A Rabbi, A Priest and an Imam walk into a bar. The Imam doesn't order a drink because it is strictly against his religious beliefs.

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Whats worse than finding one worm in your apple? Two worms.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Wanna hear a funny story? Sure Ok.

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Whoa! A talking carrot!

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? The police Johnson Oh, come in Mr Johnson

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Whats the difference between a black guy and a pizza? A black guy is a human being, and a pizza is a food you racist.

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Ask me if I'm a Banana Are you a Banana? Yes Oh, I couldn't tell in this lighting

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Why was the panda sad? It's family died when China had an earthquake.

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how did the chicken cross the road. it didnt.

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A young boy is concerned about his fathers health, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

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A dying homeless man walks into a Hospital. He is asked to leave because he doesn't have health insurance. He dies in a gutter next to where he shits.

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Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

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Knock knock It's open, come in.

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Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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