A young couple just gave birth to their first child and the doctor says, "I’ve good some good news and some bad news, what do you want first?" "Give us the bad news first", the parents reply. "Your baby has red hair", says the doctor. "Well whats the good news", ask the parents. "It’s dead", says the doctor.

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A kid with no arms or legs is stuck in the desert. Sucks to be him.

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A lot of things. Dead babies are not funny.

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How do Jewish people celebrate Christmas? Jewish people do not celebrate Christmas, for Christmas is an annual commemoration of the birth of Jesus Christ, celebrated generally on December as a religious and cultural holiday by billions of people around the world. A feast central to the Christian liturgical year, it closes the Advent season and initiates the twelve days of Christmastide. Christmas is a civil holiday in many of the world's nations, is celebrated by an increasing number of people, and is an integral part of the Christmas and holiday season.

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What did the mushroom say to the pretty lady? Nothing, because it's a mushroom.

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"This is not a drill!" - guy holding a hammer

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They say under Chuck Norris's beard, is just a chin.

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why did dinosaurs die??? because a giant rock blew them up

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What did the man say after falling off the bridge? Nothing. He died a painful and terrible death on impact.

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A Mexican walked away from a construction site.

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What's funnier then an anti-joke? People who fail at making them.

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Your Mom... is a very nice lady who makes good cookies

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Where did the 5 gay guys go? One direction

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Actually a lot because a pizza is a pizza andna Jew is a human.

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Why happened when a clothes line walked into a bar? He got hung over

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OH NO, ZOMBIES!!!!!!!!!!

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penis

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What's the similarity between a grape and an elephant? Both are purple except for the elephant.

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Last night I saw an elephant in my pajamas. I don't know why I went to the zoo in my pajamas.

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whats gay ? you

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What's worse than the titanic sinking 9-11

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a rabbi sees a nazi in time square. he simply walks past because as we are in america the nazi can do nothing to harm him.

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What is the difference between a black man and a white man? Different skin color.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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