What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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what are three words that are never used together in the same sentence ...... salid taste good

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Anti jokes.

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What's even faster than the speed of light? The speed you close out of porn when you hear someone coming into the room.

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I accidentally washed my white Labrador retriever with three red shirts and my Red Sox baseball cap. When I went to move the laundry, the dog was drowned.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenia, and don't have any friends

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What wears a white robe and shines? A special boar.

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Covietz has a large penis

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

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What's the difference between a Mercedes and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Mercedes in my garage.

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Why is it nice to wear jeans? So people don't see your undies.

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Your momma is so fat that the late, great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook her breasts for clocks

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There is a penguin at the bakery: i want 2 loaves said the baker white or brown bread says the penguin does not matter I'm a moped

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The Economy

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A woman goes to the hospital to receive an ultra-sound after taking a pregnancy test a few weeks before. The doctor comes out and says "Congratulations Susanne would you like to know the results? Susanne says "No thank you." Then, the doctor says "Good, because its actually a retarded baby that we found."

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noodles

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What's a thither? My sister with a lisp.

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Q: Why did Rapunzel fall out of the tower? A: Because she was a dumb bitch.

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Why did the blind man drown? Because he couldn't swim.

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Three guys walk into a club, one is a fat ugly chode face bastard, the second one is a 4 foot 2 cricket champion and the third is a handsome young man.

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What is fat and ugly? Your American MUM!

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im black

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Q: Has your ear operation had success? A: Hotdog with chili.

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professor x walks over to wolverine with good news, he falls and dies of a severe concussion

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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